paranoia..

Since I am pressed for time, I will not bother with an intro and just jump into it.

There is one person who hurt me, and he was in my class in ninth grade. After that, we branched off to different schools. Now, I'm in my first year of university. I thought I was just about over everything. I was moving on, and going to just continue doing the best I can do. I was happy, excited, and feeling very confident about my classes, and I felt more safe than I'd felt in a long time at my university..

I was walking down the hallway, when I see Him, standing there. He was staring right at me, and his gaze followed where I walked to. I began to panic. Thoughts race through my mind. What is he doing here? Oh my god he sees me. My heart starts beating abnormally fast. I feel the adrenaline coursing throughout me... I turn around, and R U N . I literally ran to the OPPOSITE side of campus, as fast as I could.

I sat on the steps, and was trying to process everything. I was so confused! How could I let this affect me?! I've had too many years of my life lived and directed by the influence of the negative people in my life. I thought I was going to TAKE CONTROL, and excel at a place I've already begun to love.

I feel as though I'm back at square one. I'm constantly checking hallways, and always scared to see him again.. I'm relapsing back to the old me who allowed the people who hurt me most run my life, and have such a significant impact on me.

I want to take it back.
I feel so lost.