I'm Sorry?

I'm sorry.

I’ve never really understood why people say it, plus it’s far overused. Whenever I tell someone something that’s “sad” or makes people uncomfortable to talk about, the automatic response is “I’m sorry.” I think, What? Why on Earth are you sorry? It happened to me. Besides, I don’t tell you things because I’m seeking sympathy, or silly such reasons. I tell you, because I trust you, and I trust you a lot. I tell you, because you are a good friend of mine, and I feel safe with you. I’m not looking for any “Oh poor muffin” responses. I talk, and I want you to listen.

I’ve never really understood why it’s some sort of obsessive compulsive response to always just blurt out “I’m sorry” when someone says “Oh my pet chicken died” or whatever the sad situation is.

I find that “I’m sorry” is just a phrase that people say when they have no other words. Or they have no idea how to react, and find it all just uncomfortable. But one thing I could never stand is when people tell me “I’m sorry” after I say something, I feel like they are belittling me, and it is so condescending. They are treating me as though I’m some sort of martyr or something. I mean, I’m not, obviously. I had the strength to tell you didn’t I? Personally I’ve always found it just to be something that’s shown, not said. Because they are just words. And words don’t mean hardly as much as how you act.

That’s why I hardly ever apologize. As pathetic as it sounds, I only recently found out what empathy means. Apparently it means to actually take on how someone else feels. After being through one of the worst thing ever, it’s like I can feel how much people hurt from things, and I guess that’s why I always can understand why most people act the way they do. Whereas sympathy is just feeling sorry for someone, and understanding that they feel upset or whatever they feel. Empathy has a deeper connection understanding-wise. Maybe it’s weird that I’ve never been able to be sympathetic, but always empathetic. It’s like when I hear songs, it’s not just a song to me. I have an emotional attachment to it as weird as that may sound. Who knows? Maybe it's an advantage.